Thursday, August 26, 2004

what you gonna do about it?

I'm sitting here, night, talking out loud to myself, trying to explain to myself why I took this job. Today the office called me on the intercom and asked me to "cover" a class during my planning period for an absent teacher. I didn't know I could say no so I said all I could say.
It was bizarre. They came in my room and took over, first with their bodies, then with their voices, then on their feet. I didn't know any of them and so was powerless. The only thing from me that got their attention was when I literally shouted. A girl who was rapping (I must admit, she was good) got too loud and I asked her to keep her voice down and she gave me the look, from my head to my feet, with an attitude, and I took a step forward and said, "What you looking at?" I omitted the word that belonged at the end, but she got it. (I also left out "are" that would have made it grammatically correct. What am I coming to?) It was almost like I was calling her out. Little puny old white me.
I can't write about this right now. Tomorrow.

Disposed of: an extra tape measure and an extra hammer.

Melanie Plesh


Blogger marshathib said...

Melanie Anne Plesh,
Don't give up.

These kids don't know you yet, but they will, and when they do, these kinds of problems will dwindle--not evaporate, but they will become less common. They don't realize yet how much you love them and all they are and all they can be. Sometimes it's good for kids to see that you can stand right back up. Loving them, which you obviously have down pat, sometimes requires that you stand up.

In case you need some reminders about why you took the job, could I help? You want to give these kids a gift--the gift of writing, the gift of finally being able to be who THEY want to be, not what their friends EXPECT them to be. When you give a gift, sometimes it's thrown back in your face. Do you stop trying to give? Not if you love that person. Keep trying to give, girlfriend---someone WILL accept it, and love you for it.

7:38 AM  
Blogger dancingspirit said...

Marsha, what an absolutely beautiful reply, so like the author :); Mel girl, what can I say? Welcome to NOPS, been there done that.....I bailed so I can't even say hang in there. LuvYa !

6:05 AM  

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